Over the past nine days, you’ve done the internal work—resetting your pace, presence, and patterns. Now we begin the next layer: shifting the culture.
But systems, scripts, and strategies won’t work if your team doesn’t trust the leader behind them. Every interaction with your staff is either a deposit (praise, listening, support) or a withdrawal (criticism, correction, more work).

Today is about building emotional equity with your team—so when it’s time to lead, they’re willing to follow.

The Lesson: Trust is built in the small moments

Owners and Directors often fall into Transactional Leadership—only speaking to staff when something goes wrong or when a task needs doing. This makes people feel like tools, not teammates.
To build real connection, you must see the person behind the role. Deposits aren’t fake compliments—they are moments of specific, genuine recognition.

When your “account” is full, feedback becomes coaching. When it’s empty, even a small correction feels like an attack.

The Strategy: The 3-to-1 Deposit Ratio

Today, aim to make 3 deposits for every 1 withdrawal with each staff member.

What counts as a deposit?

Specific Praise: “I loved how you handled that toddler transition—it was smooth and calm.”
Active Listening: Asking about their weekend—and actually listening.
Support: Bringing water, covering for 5 minutes, or offering encouragement during a tough moment.

Start noticing these moments. Trust is built through attention.

The Practice: Personas and Deposits

Firefighter-Slow down the “Thanks.” You tend to shout “good job!” while running past. Instead, stop, make eye contact, and spend 30 seconds being specific.

Peacekeeper-Make it real. Don’t just be “nice” to everyone—be genuine. Name the exact behavior you’re praising.

Perfectionist-Lower the critique bar. Praise something that’s 80% there. Build the bridge first—you can refine later.

Exercise: The Appreciation Audit

Pick one staff member you’ve found difficult in the past.
The Challenge: Find two genuine, work-related things they did well today.
The Delivery: Share it privately. “I noticed you did [X], and it helped the center because [Y]. Thank you.”
The Observation: Watch their body language. Did their shoulders drop? Did their tone soften? A deposit lands immediately.

Director’s Journal Prompt

“Today, I made intentional deposits into the accounts of [Name] and [Name]. I noticed the energy in the building felt [Emotion] when I prioritized connection over correction.
I’m realizing that people work for people—not for policies.”

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