Day 5: The Blind Spot Audit
The Pivot: Every leader has a shadow—the parts of our leadership we can’t see, but our staff feels every day.
Today requires the most courage of the entire 21 days.
We’re going to stop guessing how we’re perceived and start seeking honest feedback to close the gap between who we think we are and how we actually show up.
Vulnerability isn’t a weakness.
It’s the foundation of trust, respect, and real leadership.
The Lesson: The Mirror of Leadership
A blind spot is a behavior that is obvious to your team—but invisible to you.
- You might think you’re efficient, but your staff experiences you as unapproachable.
- You might think you’re flexible, but your staff experiences you as unclear.
If you don’t know your blind spots, you can’t correct the drift in your culture.
Strong programs are built when leaders are willing to say:
“I want to grow—and I need help seeing what I’m missing.”
The Strategy: The One‑Question Interview
Today, approach one or two trusted staff members.
Start with people you already have a solid relationship with.
The Script:
“I’m working on improving my leadership so I can better support this team. Can you give me some honest feedback? What is one thing I do—or don’t do—that makes your job harder than it needs to be?”
The Rule:
You are not allowed to explain, defend, or justify.
Your only response is:
“Thank you for that feedback. I’m going to reflect on it.”
This is not about fixing anything today.
It’s about listening.
Important Reminder
To identify blind spots, you must actively seek honest—even uncomfortable—feedback.
If someone is truly being honest, what they share may sting. Possibly a little. Possibly a lot.
This is not an attack. It is a gift.
Don’t say “thank you” out of politeness.
Pause and recognize the courage it took for them to speak openly.
Also remember:
- Feedback from a seasoned staff member often carries more weight than feedback from someone brand new.
- One-off comments may reflect perspective—not pattern.
- But if you hear similar feedback from multiple trusted people, it’s worth examining—even if you disagree.
The Practice: Personas and the Audit
If you are a…
- Firefighter: Don’t rush to fix it. If they say you’re disorganized, don’t stay late reorganizing. Sit with how your urgency affects others.
- Peacekeeper: Resist apologizing. You’ll want to smooth things over. Instead, stay present and receive the information.
- Perfectionist: Drop the shield. Don’t explain why you do what you do. Their perception is their reality. Listen to understand—not to win.
Day 5 Exercise: The Shadow Reflection
After receiving feedback, find a quiet moment and revisit your Stress Persona from the quiz.
Reflect on the following:
- The Link
How does this feedback connect to your persona?
(Example: “Too busy to talk” often reflects the Firefighter.) - The Impact
How might this blind spot be contributing to staff stress or burnout? - The Respect Reset
Simply asking this question made a powerful deposit into your relationship bank.
Notice how the staff member responded to being invited into the conversation.
Director’s Journal Prompt
“The hardest thing I heard today was [Feedback].
It was difficult to hear because [Reason].
However, by seeing this clearly, I can now begin to change the culture of my center.”